The Semester in Review...

Seeing as the semester from hell is finally over, I have come back to the blogosphere after abandoning it so that I could write about physiology and cover the a room of white boards. Alas I have returned and here is a list of all I have accomplished this semester.

1. Spent the entire night in an academic building
2. - Made friends with the early morning cleaning staff
3. - Become a complete and utter diet coke addict
4. - Gone to the midnight premiere of new moon
5. - Danced like a fool on stage for a stroll
6. - Performed as The Spartan Cheerleader in front of half of the university
7. - Yelled at a football player like he was a 5 year old
8. - Managed to go an entire semester without once burning anything or causing the fire alarm to go off
9. - Discovered sparkling wine andre. For $5.
10. - Managed to get more parking tickets in 2 weeks than in entire Furman career
11. - Heard my dad’s voice for the first time and discovered that he had quite the Southern accent.
12. - Did not break a dish for an entire semester.
13. - Got to be the official elf for Christmas crunk. That’s a resume booster.
14. - Discovered that I truly missed my calling in life to be a Disney princess.
15. - Made a blog then subsequently abandoned blog. Oops.
16. - Lady Gaga followed me on Twitter. Win.
17. - Rediscovered S Club 7 episodes on Youtube.
18. - Watched both seasons of Dorm Life online within 2 days.
19. - Officially became a Gleek.
20. - Rediscovered my childhood with the 3 Ninjas Kick Back
21. - Mastered riding a bike in a skirt and with a cup of coffee in one hand.
22. - According to Sporcle am a complete expert on Disney Channel Original Movies
23. - Sang “We Didn’t Start the Fire” at karaoke
24. - Discovered Beast Mode. Greatest Video Ever.
25. - Strangely did not go to a Jonas Brothers Concert. Or the Honor Society one with T. Flood. Weird.
26. - Met the mother of my future husband Ken, aka the most wonderful, amazing, mythical boyfriend ever.
27. - Found out that as a child I apparently had the world’s thickest Southern accent.
28. - Ran into a pole with my bike. In front of people. Classic.

Sweet sweet summertime

I feel like since camp is over I should write some incredibly poignant entry about what an amazing experience I had but truthfully I don't think I can. I wouldn't be doing this summer justice by writing about how wonderful it is there, how much I've changed, etc, etc. Honestly, it was a tough summer. There were times I was so frustrated and exhausted and just wanted to sleep; I was pushed in ways I didn't know I could and did things I never thought I would ever do. But I wouldn't change a bit of it. I came to understand that our campers are more than just campers- they are colleagues, equals, friends. I worked with people this summer with such joy for the world, such hope that I couldn't help but feel happy even with very little sleep. One of my friends told me that he learned that they are not people to pity and they aren't. They are individuals who deserve love and compassion and respect just as much as the next person and one should never doubt their abilities. Camp focuses so much on abilities but reminds us that we all have our own disabilities. I wish I knew how to sum up this summer adequately but I don't think my words would do enough. I learned this summer what it means to be truly selfless and to put others before you and how liberating that can be. Spearhead claims that it is more than just a camp and it really is; it permeates your life and brings you to people who can show you more about yourself and others that you would have ever thought. I hope some day each of you can find an experience like camp but until then enjoy these:

My favorite camper/counselor quotes:

- Love me tender, love me sweet, I like you, You like me....

- Miss Allison that's a rat!

- Hottie boy at 10 o'clock

- My precious cutie pie

- That's culture!

- WENIS!

- Snickers bar!

- Boobies.

- I'm having a magical time!

- Bon qui qui

- It's the climb....

- ALICE!!!!

- I love everybody.

- Those weren't real clowns.

- You're my princess.

-Let's dance up some fun!

- Can we listen to Wicked!?!?!

- Ice cream and cakey cake

- I would want to be a merperson with you...

- We Rock!

- Am I childlike in nature?

- You know what's weird, presidents poop. (seriously ben...)

- Are you my girlfriend?

- I'm gooey, chewy chocolate.

- unnawares

- Do the wookie!!

-Man, I feel like a woman.

- I just love this place...

The Life Aquatic

We found Dory!

Takin' on the Jellies- Kyle was excited

We were in awe.

Will, me, and Kyle


So last weekend me and my friend Will from camp (who should totally go to Furman by the way) went to see the awesome Kyle Synder in Atlanta and we spent most of our time there at the Georgia Aquarium. I am in no way kidding. Apparently when get 3 people who are aquarium nerds you end up there for a while. Basically we walked around and saw all of the animals and read all of the information and touched some stingrays and may have ridden down the sweet whale slide. I don’t think we could have been more enthralled by it- I maybe took about 200 pictures of the fish. The Georgia Aquarium is sweet and it sort of made me miss when I used to want to be a marine biologist, or at least a dolphin trainer.

After our aquarium adventure and the necessary shopping excursion, we ended up at a bluegrass concert. A free one. You’d think this would be a bad choice but it was some of the most fun I’ve had in a while. Everyone there was so different, the bad was good, and it was pretty fun just people watching. We ended up sitting on a Pi Kapp blanket drinking white wine we brought in in a J.Crew bag. The only thing that would have made it frattier would have been a cooler. Or a bowtie. Of course we followed this with an oyster roast/clam bake in Kyle’s back yard because that? Is the natural thing to do after a free bluegrass concert. The evening closed with a viewing of Planet Earth where I promptly fell asleep. Ultimately, I think it was a near perfect weekend- the aquarium, Atlanta, good friends, good food, and lots of J.Crew. The only thing that would have made it better? If I were a dolphin trainer for real. Oh and penguins- they were seriously lacking.

Everyday is a winding road...

Somehow camp is almost over and I have yet to figure out how it has already been 7 weeks. I’m sitting here at my dad’s mom’s house in the middle of nowhere in Virginia with very little internet access trying to convince myself that really being disconnected from the world isn’t that awful. This summer I have slowly realized that having internet constantly at your fingertips isn’t totally necessary and really, Facebook is more than a tad over-rated. Still, I find myself freaking out anytime I can actually read my email- it’s become such a special thing. Even so, it is nice to know what’s going on in the world. I really think that something massive could happen and we wouldn’t know about it; but, part of me feels that we are so wrapped up in camp world worrying about our campers that the world essentially ceases to be as important.
The past 2 weeks have been exhausting but really a lot of fun. We’ve had the older ladies for two weeks and I’ve discovered that they are perhaps some of the funniest people you will meet. I absolutely love being around them and they are usually up for taking a nap so I’m totally into that. My parents actually made it up for a talent show and I was so incredibly excited to show them what I have been doing the past 2 months. Surprisingly, my dad actually really liked it- he did get a birthday party invitation and a girlfriend so I think that he fits in pretty well. Apparently its overwhelming to see that many special people in one confined space because I have become so used it to. There are times that I think I have completely forgotten what it is like to be in a world that isn’t camp and that I may no longer be able to functioning completely in society. I’m hoping this soon comes back. But most importantly, my parents got to see why I do what I do and what a unique place Spearhead is. This week Virginia got to come and I was so happy to see her! I have gotten to see her far more this summer but it was awesome to get to show her what I’ve been doing and why I’m a total “camera whore” at camp- its true, I take a lot of pictures. It is truly exciting to get to show people you love what you are passionate about and why this population is so important and wonderful. I hope that through this blog some of you have been able to see what a wonderful place Spearhead is and how important it is to me. I wish I could share with everyone all of my pictures and stories about it because it really has been a wild ride. Somehow I went down this road in my last real summer as a college student (I’m refusing to talk about the grad school application I’ve started- its too scary) and I don’t really know where it will lead me, but I think its going somewhere good. Either way, I’ve got some great stories out of it and maybe, just maybe, cured my email addiction. Maybe not.

summer reading...

I think you should all go read these books. No excuses.
- The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime- written from the perspective of 15 year old
with autism. It is absolutely fascinating and so enlightening about how many people with
autism think.
- Look Me in the Eye- John Elder Robinson- His memoir of growing up with Asperger's without a diagnosis. If you know anyone with Asperger's, you will love this.
- Running with Scissors- So incredible and undescribeable. Go read it and you'll know what I mean.
-Pretty in Plaid by Jen Lancaster. But first go read Bitter is the New Black, Bright Lights Big Ass, and Such a Pretty Fat. These books are laugh out loud, pee in your pants funny and are so much fun to read. So read all of them. Really.
- Riding the Bus with My Sister- a really touching story about two sisters, one with special needs and their journey together. A great read, especially if you've worked with special needs.

Apparently I'm a slacker

I feel completely like a slacker but really I could blame my lack of updates on the fact that I dont actually have internet access during the week and I spend 90% of my weekends sleeping but I wont. So for those of you who I havent seen in a while, here's an update on my life at camp and everything in between.
The third week of camp went really well and since it was near the 4th of July we all got to go on a hot air balloon ride. Granted the balloon was tied to the ground so we didn't go too high, but it was a hot air balloon none the less. I've learned so far that the "old lady" cabin is really pretty fun, especially when they can't stand the creepy clown show and they hate it. My favorite camper from the week was definately this adorable woman named Miss Pat who totally had an attitude. She was completely ridiculous and therefore I loved her.
I got to celebrate the 4th in Nashville with the wonderful Allison Renfro! I was so incredibly excited to see her- it has been far too long! I love being reminded how wonderful and amazing my friends are. We got to go to downtown Nashville, hang out at Spa Renfro by the pool, and celebrate at the gorgeous Renfro farm. The farm is absolutely beautiful and it was so wonderful to be in a place where I could just relax and be with such wonderful friends. Oh and Caroline? We can still go to Mephis. I think the best part is that we ended the weekend by going to Barnes and Noble and going to Ben's house to read. Seriously, we're nerds.
Fourth week of camp was...interesting. We had some really fun campers but I did get smacked in the face a few times. Oh, and choked by a 60 year old. That was an experience and yes, my parents asked to see a picture of the lady who smacked me. That was comforting. Other than that, our campers have really fun so far and I have really enjoyed getting to know them as people, not people with special needs. I feel like we are all learning that really we all have disabilites and the best thing is to focus on everyone's abilities, not what they can't do.
That weekend (sorry this is such a long update...) my cousin got married and I got to go with my wonderful friend Nate. My parents had just gotten in from Vegas so I got to catch up with them and here all about their trip. They did call me from the Hoover Dam which made me uber jealous but hey, the present from Cirque Du Solei really helped :) I feel very blessed to have parents who I get along so well with and we all had so much fun at the wedding. Apparently, the Ritters can really throw a party. I got to see so many of my cousins, dance to "Shout" with my mom (if you know us, this makes perfect sense, see my sweet little cousin MC, and tear up the dance floor with Natey. I really cannot think of a more wonderful wedding weekend.
I just finished up with the 5th week of camp and now I feel like I'm on the downward slope of camp. I cannot believe that we have already have 5 weeks of camp. It feels like just yesterday we were all meeting for training and somehow we've already finished 5 weeks. I've really gotten to know so many amazing counselors and I feel like we have been bonded in so many ways. My favorite day was when a bunch of us went up to the lake at night to pray and share about our lives. I dont know if we are all realizing what this summer means for us quite yet but I know that this summer is something big. My cabin this week was fun and they wanted to do something in the talent show so I was really excited...gotta love that Camp Rock.
These campers mean so much to me and I realize that they are teaching me so much about myself- that I need to relax and go with the flow sometimes, what it means to be truly selfless, how wonderful it is to put people before yourselves and how special the little things in life are.
Well friends that's been the last 3 weeks of my life. I wish I was able to share with all of you absolutely everything about this summer so if I see you and make some crazy comment, its probably from camp and I've forgotten that I'm not there. I hope you all are having wonderful incredible summers.
So until my next chance to have internet....adios amigos.

Today's the day....

that Virginia is finally 21! Hooray for celebrating at the only bar in town that is not completely sketchy! I can't imagine going there with anyone else but you. Its been a crazy 7 years (wow that makes me feel old) but through it all you are there to laugh, cry, vent, or drool over Zac Efron with. You are the Nemo to my Dory, the Flounder to my Ariel, the Eve to my Wall-E. So happy birthday love and many many more!

Hottie Boy at 10 o'clock

I probably should have counted how many times I heard that phrase uttered in Cabin 12 this week but I doubt I can actually count that high. To say that they were boy crazy is putting it lightly; every boy was a hottie and no one was immune from their obsession. The good news? I'm sure all of the boys at camp have increased self-esteem and according to my campers, Matt and I are perfect for each other and will be getting married in a double cermony with Rodney and Shelby. So that's how my week went...absolutely ridiculous things that my campers say that never cease to amaze me and make me smile. I did, however, how annoying it is to be sick at camp and feel awful; but I certainly felt much better knowing that one of my sweet campers prayed for me to feel better at lunch. I feel like there are so many things that I am learning at camp, about my campers, about myself. Rarely would you ever meet a group of people so loving and unconditionally accepting as you will at camp. Their love and devotion is inspiring and truly I must say I feel blessed to have met some of my campers. I think my favorite part is the sense of pride I feel when the complete somehting they didn't think they could or how proud they are after the talent show. The past 2 weeks have already been a whirlwind that I don't think I could adequately describe to someone who hasn't been there. But as much fun as it is, I'm not quite sure I have ever treasured the hours from 1 to 3 as much as I do now. Either I get some much needed rest or I go to Starbucks or Leopard Forrest to check my email like an addict. Or I find out all at the same time that Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, and Michael Jackson all died. Seriously, talk about shock. Oh and the governor of SC? He totally went missing but was really in Argentina with his mistress. Really??? Apparently a lot can happen in a few days without connection to, oh say, any form of communication. Now I feel like I need to catch up on a weeks worth of Perez Hilton posts which is a lot. Sure I could just ask someone but I needed a dose of biting humor (I did like that one of campers finally caught onto the sarcasm I constantly spew- I liked that one a lot.) I guess I must need some sort of flow of information to keep me connected to the world but I am learning that certain things just aren't necessary to check all the time. Example, I no longer excessively stalk people on facebook. Certain people occasionally but the mass stalking that news feed enabled has been squashed. Progress I say. But still I refused to believe any of the news until I read it somewhere because I am sort of incredibly gullible. Alas, so much had happened in my 2nd week of camp that I am still processing it. I keep feeling like there are stories to share but then I am reminded how exhausted I am so I stop thinking. I'm sure at some point there will be many stories but until then enjoy a list of some of the funny, albeit not always socially acceptable quotes and notes from the week.

- One of my campers thinking she was a cat. I wish I could say this was made up but its true.

- A Barefoot Contessa obsessed camper who will sometimes talk to Ina herself.

- Our pet butterfly we kept in a box with holes in it. I have no idea how it actually lived 3 days. Resilient little bugger.

- One camper telling me that both of my bosses were hotties. To their faces. Awkward.

- Being told I was a radically cool friend because of my love of the Little Mermaid.

- He then told me I would be the one person he would choose to be a merperson with.

- It's culture!

- Fantasia 2000 with a little Toy Story thrown in

- Anything ever said by Paul Benton. I quote him often.

- The enormous spider we found on a campers bed. I was in no way calm.

- Escaping to Starbucks at any chance.

- Seeing my favorite professor at L.F.- it felt like the real world finally.

- Being smothered in the pool by Henry and Joel.



Now I'm going to go a take a shower...without shoes! And get into a bed without the fear of bugs! Little victories I say.

Can I ask you a question?

The first session of camp is done and I feel exhausted already. A good kind of exhuasted but exhausted none the less. We had a lot of fun this week despite the fact that it rained, oh every single day. Ever been in a cabin with a bunch of people terrified of thunder storms? That was fun. Oh, and I got married I think three times to a 10 year old who calls me his honey and apparently believe that it is ok to have 4 boyfriends. Camp definately does something for your self esteem because at some point, I think we all had someone who thought we were their boyfriend or girlfriend. The good news is that this first week was a lot of fun and definately a learning experience. Even though we are all so tired and were so ready to return to places with internet access, I miss camp and all of the funny things that happen there. The good thing? I am learning that really it is not necessary to check facebook 20 times a day. I think that is a positive life change.
Things I learned at camp this week:
- Modesty is an interesting thing at camp- it doesn't always exist
- Campers love when you lip synch to miley cyrus. love it.
- Chelsea Garber was right- when in doubt, bleach it.
- I have never been more excited to go to Walmart in my life. Ever.
- Having someone give you an imaginary crown and tell you a princess can make your week.
- Fighting imaginary giants is harder than it looks.
- Nap time is a good thing. A very good thing.
- Being cut off from the media can be really refreshing.
- Just say no questsions- that always works.
- Never forget that you're diabetic.
- If you think you've stepped on a snake, just run and don't look back.
- It is possible to forget what society is like in a week.
- You don't realize how dirty you are until you're in public and you realize that everyone else is a lot cleaner than you.
- Always wear shoes. Always.

So until my next access to internet,
here's to many more stories of ridiculous things that happen at camp.

Live from Leopard Forrest...

So my friends this will have to be quick because I have precious few moments on the internet here at Leopard Forrest. Somehow with only two days under my belt I am already exhausted! As always I feel like I need a nap. The first two days have been a whirlwind of stories that I wish I could put into words. I am doing well without facebook which is a huge accomplishment for me! Our campers are really fun to be around and of course are stoked that our theme is Camp Rock. There may in fact be some dancing to Camp Rock at the talent show. I hope you are all having a wonderful summer and I really cannot wait to tell all you so many hilarious stories!

Can I have some hand sanitizer?

So we survived the first week of training at camp and what a week it was. There was lots of cleaning, painting, mixing a beautiful mauve color that Marty hated, shoveling a little dirt, learning how to string fishing line, dance parties, movies, painting Camp Rock lyrics on the walls, and a little bit of digging for worms. And there was the part where we all stared at our cell phones on the way to the Wal-Mart in TR to get service. I don't think I have ever seen a group of people so excited to go to Wal-Mart on a Tuesday night or probably ever will again. And the movies, oh the movies. Where else would you watch My Big Fat Greek Wedding, Holes, Mean Girls, Rent, and Wild Hogs all in the same week while laughing hysterically/hyperventilating/making weird animal noises (cough Becca cough). And the classes where Shawn slept and Ben and I made up MASH for Cuadrado while Eric said some really, really awkward things. Oh, and hand sanitizer. Lots and lots of hand sanitizer.
Here are just some of the highlights:
- I'm wearing a watch!- Cuadrado
- Cuadrado's subsequent panic attack
- I'm like Beetlejuice...- Shawn
- Triplets? That's like twins with 3 right?- Shawn
- Unnawares?
- Seriously, just don't do the split.
-Man capris? No thank you.
- Artic blast
- Miss Allison, that's a rat!
- Let's get freaky in the pool! Yeah, don't ever say that to a camper- that's bad.
- 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8, you choose.
-Ben's mad crazy dancing skills
- The WTF face
- You're a twin!?!?! No way!
- Can we take Mimi, Tuck and Ling Ling too?
And perhaps the greatest thing of all....
Cuadrado wearing Chacos. Yes Chacos.
Here's to the next 8 weeks.

I'm a senior?

So somehow I have come to realize that I am actually going to be a senior in college which means that in a year, I'll be in the real world. Well, crap. Where did all the time go and how on earth am I an adult? I mean I still want to be a mermaid and love the zoo so how am I quite nearly an adult? The good news is I still have a year left to be, well, not quite an adult and eat cereal for all meals and sleep til noon. So these are some of the things I have learned this year...and yes, they all really did happen.


1. Olive oil is flammable. Very flammable.
2. Microwaves are wonderful inventions, except when they attack.
3. Regarding 1 and 2, the fire department is very understanding. Campus police? Not so much.
4. Good roommates are key, including ones who will turn off your alarm and tell you go to class.
5. Edward Cullen is a god.
6. Comparing a boy to said Edward Cullen is a very, very disappointing thing.
7. Seeing the midnight showing of the Jonas Brothers in 3-D? Awesome. Being told its nice your parents let you out at midnight? Priceless.
8. You don’t know popular until you are the only adult surrounded by 20 5-year-olds.
9. Those 5-year-olds? They think that you knowing the hoedown throwdown dance is really cool.
10. 2nd graders are TALL. Somehow they are all almost as tall as you.
11. When you’re down, reading fmylife.com will instantly make you feel better.
12. Being carded for a drink is expected. Being carded to get into a movie in front of high
schoolers is embarrasing.
13. The GRE sucks. A lot.
14. The only thing better than being in Wales for two weeks are the friendships you make.
15. The friends you make in college are your family, for better or worse or smoking microwave
or panic attack- whatever.
16. Showering in a rugby club in Wales? Not nearly as bad as it sounds.
17. It is vitally important to know how to use a fire extinguisher. Teach your roommates if
necessary.
18. True friends will put your dress back together with safety pins.
19. Having all the elementary schoolers measure themselves against you how tall they are?
Wow, that was sad.
20. Note to boys: Girls don’t think vampires are attractive. They think romantic boys are
attractive.
21. I may have the soul of a gay man, or a least part of it.
22. Cranberry juice is disgusting. Absolutely disgusting.
23. It is completely ok to have a Little Mermaid themed 21st birthday.
24. Princess movie marathons are quite possibly the best thing ever.
25. Spray painting a wall only makes the damage look worse.
26. Want to see real Southern culture? The Barn and Delilah and karaoke. Oh and jello shots
carried around on a platter by Deliliah.
27. You know how in High School Musical they say they wish it would all just slow down? That’s
how you feel when all your friends graduate from college.
29. If you don’t know this, know it now: Claymation is of the devil and is out to get you.
30. The teacher voice always works. Always.
31. The Hills is completely fake but watching it always makes you feel so much better about
yourself.

And finally…
32. Greeting the janitor in the 24-hour study room at 5:30 AM is generally frowned upon as he
will not be hyped up on caffeine or quite so chipper.

This is a day in my life...from January

As I approach my 21st birthday I slowly realize that I am becoming an, eeek, adult. The mere thought terrifies me. I am, after all, the girl whose life goal is still to be the Little Mermaid and I want a crown for my birthday. Safe to say that the idea of being an adult terrifies me but today I am even more scared. Why? Because today is my first visit to the “big kid” dentist. My entire life I have gone to the kiddie dentist but apparently they can’t treat you once you’re 21 so alas I must venture to the terrifying place of a dentist’s office without toys, kites on the ceiling, and numerous copies of Highlights magazine. I wake up on this doomed day having not been able to sleep out of fear and the fact that I literally CANNOT breathe. Seriously, I am so stopped up that I feel like the Hoover Dam releases every time I sneeze. So alas I get ready to head to the dentist. I have only ever been to one dentist in my entire life and have known this man since I was 3 so embarking on a journey with a new person poking around in my mouth is terrifying. He was the same dentist who cured my fear of going his office when I realized that routine cleanings weren’t nearly as horrible as when I had to go to him for orthodontic check-ups that involved lots of wire and pain but, natch, colorful rubber bands. I was so comfortable with my old dentist- they practically knew everything about me- so going to someone new is utterly terrifying and I feel just like I did when I was a kindergartener on my way to my first day of school. I even want my mommy. I have tried to make myself look awake and refreshed this morning despite the way I feel so that I make the best possible impression on these new people entering into my life. I put on a cute but comfy outfit that makes me look at least 18 (which is an accomplishment) and meticulously brush and floss my teeth. Yes I know it’s a bit like working out before going to the gym so you look better in your cute new work out clothes but first impressions matter, especially in matters of oral care. I am nothing but a perfectionist so arriving at the dentist with sparkling teeth is essential. Unfortunately, my perfectionist nature means that I am also terrified of having unsightly, un-perfect teeth- even if no one else would notice. Cavities have always been one of my biggest fears (coming in only slightly behind snakes, failing grades, and evil personified in clay- Gumby) so the mere thought of having one nearly sends me into panic mode. The entire week before my appointment I have been brushing far more than necessary to ensure that I don’t loose my membership into the exclusive “No fillings” club and that I make the best possible first impression upon a dentist who knows my family and if my previous dental experience is any indication, I am going to be with these people for a while.
I get in my car on a dreary Tuesday morning to head to the office of my new dentist armed with my new insurance card and $60 cash from my dad (also known as the man who fears all checks and has written maybe 5 of them in his life). The office is the cutest little house that looks absolutely charming and I walk in feeling much better about the situation. I fill out my information and nearly panic about writing down previous hospitalizations. Sure, my head trauma because I fell off the counter as a baby hasn’t affected me at all (really) and probably has nothing to do with my oral health but I want to be thorough so I put it down anyway. That said I feel like they don’t need to know that I suffer from OCD a- I don’t want to freak these people out after all. I am reading my drop-dead, laugh out loud, utterly hilarious new book in a desperate attempt to keep my mind off the impending doom and chat with a sweet lady from my church about how ridiculous college schedule are and have almost forgot where I am when the dental hygienist calls my name. I feel like I am walking to my death although my head is so heavy that I may as well be. Let’s just say that that hygienist was probably very grateful for that small paper mask protecting her from my germs. I sit down in the chair of horror and look at all the high tech equipment surrounding me. I was used to kites on the ceiling and toys in the corner. This was going to be a long day. After taking my x-rays (I was a bit disappointed they didn’t call them pictures), we begin the torture. The hygienist is as cute as she can be and she tells me about her children while she meticulously scrapes my teeth with some form of twisted metal that makes me want to run and go get my Pinky bear. I have never experienced this particular kind of painless torture before but I still look to make sure she isn’t getting too much junk off my teeth- doesn’t look too bad but I’m no expert so I’m still terrified. When she finishes and tells me that my teeth look great, I sheepishly smile and ask her what on earth she was doing to my teeth. Apparently, that whole teeth scraping thing is routine and is nothing to sneeze at (literally) and anyway my teeth look great so it doesn’t matter. Whew. First crisis averted. And now to the cleaning. I get cookie dough polish (they have more flavors than my kiddie dentist which means I’ve been getting gypped my whole life) but it doesn’t matter because like I said, I can’t smell anything so it may as well be utter lack of sense of smell flavor. She finishes the cleaning and declares I have beautiful teeth (HOORAY) and that the dentist will be in shortly. This is my final hurdle in my big adventure because dentists are always the ones who announces the dreaded expulsion from the “No Cavity” club so I am still somewhat (read absolutely) scared.
My dentist comes in and he is the most adorable little old man I have ever seen. He is just presh and makes me wish he was my grandpa. This man even has cute little old-fashioned glasses he uses to look at my teeth. He is perfect and I could get used to having to go to the big people dentist. He does that little poking and prodding thing all dentists do and then announces that I have great teeth! Alas, my membership to the “No Fillings” club is intact and I can go home with the knowledge that the world’s most adorable old man thinks my teeth are pretty. I head out with a spring in my step and a turquoise toothbrush (my favorite color) and the knowledge that I have completed my first big adult-like appointment. I feel accomplished and naturally decide that I need a new pair of fabulous shoes to celebrate my survival of doing something that most people wouldn’t think twice about doing. Unfortunately, I’m a poor college student so instead I head back to my trusty Facebook account to announce to the world that I have successfully completed my first visit to the big people dentist and read up on a little Perez Hilton. And now, with my 21st birthday less than 2 weeks away, I begin to prepare to work up the nerve to order my first legal drink (when they will no doubt think I am 17) and cement the fact that I am no longer 5 like I think I am. But I still want those Ariel cupcakes and crown at my birthday.