Turkey and Cray Cray

Ahhh Thanksgiving. It is seriously one of my favorite holidays (right behind Christmas because really presents!) I love that it is still mostly uncomercialized apart from the necessary Charlie Brown special, all about giving thanks, and being decidedly American (presumably by gorging ourselves on lots and lots of food.) But to be honest what makes Thanksgiving is turkey with a side of cray-cray. Thanksgiving is so wonderful because it brings out the wackadoo in all of us while being surrounded by food loving prepared (or bought I guess) while there may or may not have been a crisis in the kitchen. Maybe it’s the excessive amounts of Sweet Tea we drink. You don’t drink sweet tea at all major family dinners? Where are you from- the North?? Since there are no presents or songs, unless you count my personal favorite Albuquerque Turkey, which I will gladly serenade you with, it’s all about the meal- sitting down with your family’s combined gene pool and dining together. Of course no family can come together for any significant length of time with out bringing out the cray-cray. I am referring of course to the sudden idea that your middle aged self can certainly ride the contraption that your son/daughter/niece/nephew/random neighbor got last year despite the fact you hurt yourself last year. Nothing says thanks like the capacity to learn from misjudging your coordination. It’s the fact that at any point during Thanksgiving Day, someone somewhere is using a fire extinguisher on the turkey while simultaneously flipping out and possibly crying (this hasn’t actually happened at our house but I suspect this is only because I have yet to make the turkey). There is always a father out there burning himself while trying to start a festive fire in the hearth or generations arguing about which recipe to use. In short, we’re nuts. Maybe its all the combined genetics (the royals must have a kickin time!) or the impending stress of planning for Christmas but something always goes awry. Perhaps your dog with steal some of the food or you will knock something over on the prized lace tablecloth with your natural grace but the day will be far from perfect- which is exactly why I love it!

There is something so wonderful about the sheer simplicity and abounding craziness of Thanksgiving. I mean the whole things is based on the idea of Pilgrims and Indians feasting together and being all hunky dory with each other which we all know is RIDICULOUS- there is no way the bright color-loving Indians would party with the dully monochromatic Pilgrims. Someone will always end up screaming obscenities at the TV during the pig game and at least one person will end up sick/in the ER/ passed out. With me it tends to be an injury, what with the combined klutziness of all of us in one room.

To be fair, Thanksgiving is sort of the last big hurrah before all that is Christmas. It’s like the calm before the storm, the nicely organized storm selves before the chaos that is Black Friday. Personally I can’t stand Black Friday. Any other time, TJ Maxx and Target are a beacon of fabulously priced shoes and fun dorm decorations. But Black Friday? It’s like the apocalypse (if the apocalypse started promptly at 5 am with doorbuster deals til noon!). I prefer to spend the day after Thanksgiving decorating for Christmas to get the maximum amount of decoration time out of it. And yes, your adult children will be angry if you decorate the tree without them so don’t even try it mister! I love eating leftovers while trimming the tree and placing my Nutcracker collection strategically around the house and displaying my still pristine American Girls right under the tree (ask me how old I am I dare you). The day after Thanksgiving is my official start to the Christmas season. Don’t even get me started on Christmas music before then or, the horror!, Santa at the mall the day after Halloween. Seriously guys, isn’t the big guy supposed to be busy making toys so that he can spend DECEMEBER, you know the month Christmas is actually in, listening to kids (ok me) asking for a puppy with a big red bow (and possibly another American Girl doll because Kit totally looks like me!)? But once Thanksgiving’s over I’m all Hark the Herald Angels Singing with my tacky Christmas sweater while baking cookies for the class party. Until then I am ALL about Thanksgiving and all that it brings. Besides I like my turkey with gravy and a little cray-cray berry sauce. And for that, I give thanks.

Tales of a Medical School Friday Night

Ok so first I’m not actually in medical school seeing as would probably have a mental breakdown at least once a week. But I do happen to go to a school with medical students and have taken on their stressors and diet of diet coke, sugar, coffee, and pasta. So when some girls in my class decided to have a cook out with some medical students it seemed like a good idea. Burgers, desert, and catch phrase? So there. A word of caution, sometimes future doctors don’t always know how long it takes to cook a burger and really you should not eat something still moo-ing. Wouldn’t want to get a disease with a name that I can’t pronounce.

Naturally of course, all our discussions somehow segwayed into medical talk (most of which I honestly had no idea was) where we whined about how tired we were and discussed topics that I’m sure no one else would ever think of. Like different types of leukemia and neurology. Don’t worry I know you’re jealous. So when the talking got a little too heavy we decided to play Catch Phrase. For those who have never played with me, I take Catch Phrase seriously. As serious as your life J.D. I am one intense Catch Phraser so I was ready to take the med school boys on. And while my description of Fraggle Rock as “Ghetto Sesame Street” was pure brilliance, never have I played a game of Catch Phrase where so many clues were diseases and medications. Seriously? Lycra ¹ Lyrica. Like not even close. And who knows the actually name of the virus that causes mono (oh, doctors would I guess) and why the heck is it in Catch Phrase?

After many epic Catch Phrase battles, our talking somehow turned to reflexes. As in your doctor tapping you on the knee reflexes. Let me clarify. We tested reflexes. On a FRIDAY night. With coasters. If that’s not cool I don’t know what is. Naturally I impressed everyone with my ridiculously overactive reflexes (funny that this has never translated into reflexes that are actually useful in sports) but the damage was done. We actually tested each other’s reflexes for fun. Because apparently in grad school, that’s what’s fun. At least at the end of the day, there are other nerds right there with me who think that testing reflexes with coasters is totally normal. And know that Fraggle Rock really was Ghetto Sesame Street.

You know you're in grad school when...

a. Friday night activities include eliciting other people's reflexes. With a coaster.

b. When talking about the bear you've had since you were born, all you can think is: "Hmm Pinky Bear has cataracts!"

c. You're given the reflex hammer shaped like a giraffe because really people are tired of hearing about it.

d. You have no idea what day it is apart from what TV shows are on.

e. all of the above

Guess what the answer is?

EPIC FAIL

Hmmmm well this is interesting. I typed in the URL into my search bar and this blog didn't automatically come up (HelloRoss.com did but if you read it you would totally understand...). My computer's short memory span aside, I'm guessing that not recognizing my URL is a nice way of telling me that I am an EPIC FAIL at blogging. The problem isn't that I have nothing to say (far too often I have way too much to say and don't shut up) but that I have no time to ever write anything down. Or when I do have time I have zero energy and a nap is just so much more inviting. These are all wonderful explanations as to why I have zero blog posts for August and September. Zero. Zilch. Nada. Negative Ghostrider. Basically I fail at blogging (or more actually typing a blog instead of thinking it and telling myself what a great blog post it would be!).

In my defense I sort of started grad school over the summer and it has, in short, consumed my life. Seriously. I wake up thinking things like "Tibial tuberosity" or "What does a lesion in C5 cause?" Then I'm all panicy for the rest of the day (most of you would consider this my normal behavior) and hence have no time to blog. If you've never attended grad school there is one thing you need to know- when people say its their entire life, they aren't trying to be funny. They are as serious as your life JD. I may or may not have decorated my living room with drawings from Anatomy and I refuse to apologize for wearing a plastic skull as a crown as I was learning the cranial nerves. My life is currently consumed with all things musculoskeletal and neurosciencey (hey I made a new word!) so you'll have to excuse me if things like a blog slip my mind occasionally (read: all the time).

Which leads me to why I'm writing this right now... Basically I have joined the league of CrackBerries and iPhones and now get internet with my phone. Yes, sweet sweet 3G and unlimited access to email and Facebook. Being able to check such important things like notifications whenever the heck I want to (between classes of course!) has left me with downtime as I try to procrastinate just a little before settling down for the night with my books and notes. So here we are. Blogging. For real blogging. No more abandonment because the world? Need to hear what I say.

And for your viewing pleasure this is what I spent the entirety of July and August doing...

Coloring.

The Past 2 Months...In Pictures

Wonderful Friends visiting on James Island!

MUSC Happy Hour the first Weekend of Class

Mostly we all just wanted free food...

Princesses in Downtown Disney

Such wonderful friends at Mandy's wedding

The always beautiful Katie with me at the Cotton Docks for Bridge's wedding!

Beautiful Deltas at Bridgette's Wedding-

so blessed to share that day with them!

Beautiful Al at the reception with the most

beautiful sunset over the marsh

Camp Spearhead!

This is how I have decorated my apartment...

Right where I wish I spent every weekend-

Sullivan's Island

OT girls Downtown for July 4th Fireworks!

Poogan's Porch- with such incredible friends!

How am I a grown up?

Ahh grad school. We are successfully through half of our first semester and still we are all here. I would be lying if I said that we haven’t mostly all had a “What the heck am I doing with my life” moment. Not that what we’re learning is uninteresting- more that it is just so daggum much to learn in not a whole lot of time. Right now we are sort of walking anatomy zombies- seriously we walk around and talk about anatomy, constantly asking what inserts where and what muscle does what. We’re kind of obnoxious right now but the good news? We mostly just see each other so we aren’t exactly annoying the general population. Somehow we are slowly but surely making our way through anatomy, even if we do sort of look weird walking around touching each other and saying “Oh! There’s the greater trochanter.”

What’s really sad is that people are always asking how much I love living in Charleston and how wonderful it is and if I’ve been to this place or that. The problem? Ummm I don’t really have a life outside of class and my classmates. All of those delicious restaurants? I might have driven past them. Fabulous stores? Looked in the windows and walked right past because I’m in grad school y’all and Publix is having a sale on diet coke! More embarrassing? I get excited about specials at the grocery stores and I will print coupons thank you very much.

When a friend on mine got married here a few weeks ago (which by the way was probably my favorite wedding ever as evidenced by the ridiculous number of pictures I took of the decorations and was just so filled with love), I was so excited to see everyone but sort of embarrassed that I really couldn’t show anyone around or tell them places to go, mostly because I had not ventured anywhere but my apartment, the Chick-fil-a and class. I hated that I couldn’t hang out with everyone from the wedding late that night or on the beach but anatomy was calling – as it always is. Its gotten better over the past few weeks and I can actually say that I have now been to more places but that mostly happened over July 4^th when everyone is in town.

I definitely went through a time where I really felt like I had no life- I existed in class, studying, and working out in the gym (where generally I was reading anatomy notes). My life was (and still is) anatomy- I literally would wake up the morning of a test thinking of muscles and nerve innervations and have actually fallen asleep with my beloved Netter cards. I don’t think you can ever really prepare for the emotional upheaval of graduating and moving onto real life- whether a job or graduate school. Everything I learn now is completely valuable to my profession and I truly have to learn it. Yes I will be expected to know that loss of the common peroneal nerve will lead to foot drop an I should be able to rattle that off. Even having friends go through this last year didn’t prepare me. You really can’t know what its like and what a life shift it is until you go through it yourself. Sure, you think it can’t be that bad and that yes you’re ready to be a grown up. But then your bike gets stolen, you can’t figure out how to unclog the drain and it might flood the kitchen, and dear lord you have so much to learn in a week! So you call your mom and cry and she tells that you that yes it will be ok, even if it sucks right now, and to just call the maintenance guy already. You learn to rely on yourself but also ask for help. I think there’s a reason why graduate class are generally very close- there’s only 42 of us and already we are all close, mostly because we see each other everyday and we are all going through the same thing. We rely on each other, cry and complain to each other, laugh and joke together just to relieve the stress, and yes we palpate each other for surface anatomy. Here’s a tip- you get really close when you have to feel each other’s ischial tuberosities.

So basically, all I do right now is school and study (yes even more than I did at Furman) but it is all actually very interesting to me. Even if I have moments, of not liking it all and wondering why the heck I decided to go straight to grad school, overall I really do love it and love being here in Charleston- even if I don’t get to go out and experience it that frequently, when I do I adore it. So right now my life is school but that’s ok because of the people I have around me and what I get to experience everyday is pretty good most days. So if I don’t answer my phone, its ok because I’m probably off somewhere studying or maybe drawing the nerve innervations all over myself and putting up pictures of the brachial plexus to decorate my apartment.

Today was a fairytale...

I love weddings. Love em- sometimes inexplicably. I love watching too people in love, surrounded by family and friends, commit to each other for the rest of their lives. I love watching the groom's face right when the bride walks in and the way her father will beam. I love the air of excitement, celebration, and love. I love the ridiculous wedding guests, dancing, the food, an always delicious cake, and taking lots and lots of pictures. I've loved weddings since I was 3 and in my very first wedding- my cousin Lynn's. Ok, so at the time I did not love the 15 lb. garland on my tiny head, but I loved being there with everyone, dancing around the perimeter of the dance floor (according to my mom) and getting a flower girl gift basket upon arrival (my most distinct memory). Now lest you think I am like that girl in 27 Dresses who is utterly obsessed and has been in, natch, 27 weddings, its not just the actual wedding that I love. No, I love weddings for the way they bring everyone and their crazy family together and the sheer joy in celebrating love with one another. I love the way they become sort of mini reunions as family and friends celebrate together and of course do the electric slide.

Maybe weddings are on my mind because a few weeks ago I went to Orlando for a friend of mine's wedding. It could not have been more beautiful and most importantly, more Mandy and David. I love the way weddings depict the couple's personalities and this wedding fit them to a tee. So elegant, so sweet, so simple, so filled with laughter and love. I was in love with it. Everything was so perfect- the sweet simplicity of the bridesmaids, the colors, the reception at the yacht club, the first dance, the beautiful cake. But more importantly it was so perfect because it was so filled with love. If you know Mandy and David, then you know what I'm talking about- the entire room was filled with their love for each other and our love for each of them.

It was so incredible to be reunited with so many of my college friends and to celebrate such a wonderful occasion together. I cannot explain my sheer joy at seeing my sweet big, Allison, in the airport and embracing her for the first time in far too long.

It was so wonderful to catch up with old friends and dance ridiculously;

to be filled with excitement for the weddings to come this summer. Despite the fact that the weekend had some interesting mishaps (one bed for 4 girls? I don't think so Skippy!; or driving everywhere in a really sketchy cab with Pedro), those were all forgotten that beautiful Saturday night in Orlando.

Weddings remind me how truly blessed we are to be surrounded by love- whether its a significant other, family, friends- we are all truly lucky to love. I was reminded of this even more when the Tri Delts surrounded Mandy and sang "By My Side." It always reminds me that love should encircle us, envelope us, protect us, surround us. Nothing is so sweet as singing to the bride with dear friends that "there is a love here, that we can't deny."

Hearing the lovely toasts made me so excited to prepare a toast for my dearest friend Virginia when she gets married- thinking back on our friendship made me tear up in sheer gratitude for her and the love that she has in her life. Weddings are a beautiful reminder of the love we are capable of having for others and is such a beautiful representation of that love. So yes, I love weddings. I love everything about them but mostly I love love and the people who love me and who I love. So to all of you out there who I love, happy wedding season and happy loving!

Out of the bubble and into the (sort of) real world

Ahh Graduation. One of the most important days of your life where you are ushered from school into the real world. Or into grad school to avoid the real world for another 2 years, as is my case. I wish I could say that it was one of the most important days of my life that I will never forget and all that emotional stuff. But really that's not me. Sure, it was really exciting and an incredible day that I will never forget but not because I walked across a stage. It was more important because it was the culmination of four wonderful years of friends, memories, and life. So we went to my favorite restaurant, Brick Street, for lunch since graduation was at night. Naturally its my family so there was a lot of ridiculousness at lunch including but not limited to my dad filming the barbershop quartet there that was singing and be overall embarrassing. Embarrassment aside, I got to have sweet potato cake (aka heaven in cake form) so my day was pretty much incredible after that. Since graduation was a few hours away and I was banned from napping (apparently four hour naps aren't always appropriate), my brother just sat and looked at espn.com while I packed. What a fun-filled afternoon. Since we wouldn't have time for actual dinner, my mom naturally packed a picnic. A full picnic. We're talking cheese and crackers, fruit, chicken nuggets, cookies, and of course champagne. Since my mom was worried about making trash she decided to bring disposable champagne glasses. Tiny little glasses whose bottoms kept falling off which she proceeded to carry across campus as we walked to take pictures. Nothing like watching your always rule-abiding momma carry champagne across your dry campus.

We took pictures. A lot of pictures. Mostly at my request because I feel the need to document my life constantly. Poor big brother had to take a ridiculous amount of photos until I was pleased with a Christmas card picture. Don't worry he's totally used to this.

So then of course we went to the actual graduation. Well they went to the stadium and I went to wait to line up and listen to a man who could not have been more monotonous. Dude, we're not listening and we're not going to listen just give it up. Its a Furman tradition for the graduates to walk down the mall from the auditorium to the stadium as they walk into graduation. Of course I was wearing heels so like any good Southern girl I walked most of the way barefoot, with lots of looks from parents lining the mall (believe they weren't my parents). So we walk into the stadium and of course all of my professors are at the front of the line of faculty. Do I remain composed and simply walk by? Of course not. I proceeded to yell "T.Cat!" very loudly at my advisor and then laugh the rest of the way down the line. Of course I was not composed- that would be so unlike me. I sat in my seat and waited listening to my friend Andrew give a hilarious graduation address and cried when Dr. Shi urged us to hold on, let go, and move on. It was rather moving but the emotions I felt were so indescribable- excitement, nervousness, pride, fear. Yeah a whole lot happened. I didn't exactly realize just how many more Bachelor of Arts degrees there were than Bachelor of Science- we looked like a small lot compared to them so I had to wait. A lot. Somehow event though it was May, it got very cold that night so by the time it was my turn to walk I was shivering. Really shivering. Ok so I wasn't shivering right when I walked across the stage- all that was going through my head was "Don't fall" and keep the daggum hat on my head. So it happened. I didn't fall. I walked across the stage. I shook Dr. Shi's hand and laughed when I passed my professors. I cheered and cried a little and threw my cap in the air (not very high though). And then just like that it was over. Four years were done and I was letting go of the Furman bubble. There were lots of hugs and squeals and cries of "I love you" but it was done, four year had passed and it was time to leave. As we walked out of the stadium I didn't really feel anything besides cold, thirst, and tired. It wasn't until I made it to the downtown celebration that I felt the importance of what had just happened and how this really would be the last time we were together. There were surprises of old friends, some tears with dear friends, and lots of laughter and a little dancing. In short it was the perfect way to end those four years and open up the door to the years ahead. Granted the next day I didn't really feel any more like an adult- probably because I was packing. A lot. Not really the ideal situation for someone who's OCD. So its all over. My years at Furman are done and now I'm an alum. I can't describe what the past four years have meant to me and the relationships I have been blessed with there. It has been the biggest things in my life, a catalyst for my personal and spiritual growth and the source of deep, abiding friendships. There were lots of laughs, some tears, crazy adventures, fountain hopping, and a hell of a lot of pictures. So here's to you Furman and all that you've brought us. Now its time to burst the bubble and enter the sort of real world.

A letter to Dad

Dear Dad,

Its been quite a while since I last saw you- 19 years today in fact even though I don’t remember a lot from back then. I do know I was a very loved little girl who loved princesses, playing with her annoying big brother, baking with her momma and of course her daddy. I remember flying down the stairs when you came home at night and the way you always came to my rescue. I remember missing you a lot when I was little and you weren’t there anymore and how much I clung even more to Momma and Jonathan. I remember crying myself to sleep because I wished you were there and you weren’t- I sat in bed and hugged my Pinky Bear wishing and praying you would come find me somehow. Slowly, then suddenly I grew up. Momma got married and I had another Dad. I went to school. I fought with Jonathan probably more than I should have. I laughed and playing and still liked princesses. I used to wish you were there all the time but then I grew up and things changed. I realized you were there- when I was happy, when I was mad, when I hated school and was stressed out, when something big happened in my life and I wished more than anything I could see you. Last week I graduated from college. I wish I could say how quickly it came but I can’t. I feel like I was just a little girl playing outside and suddenly I am a (sort of) adult. Even more, I wished you were there- sitting in the stadium, watching and cheering. I longed to see your pride, to hug you and tell you I loved you, to laugh and to cry. I wanted to take pictures with you like we used to and to hold you tight. But I couldn’t- even though I have wished on many a star that I could. Still, I know you were there, watching from above where you have watched over us for so long. I know you would be so proud. Not just of me but of Jonathan and what a great young man he is and the ways we have relied on each other to get through the most difficult times. Even after all this time we are still yours and we try so hard to make you proud and show you we love you, even from all the way down here. It was hard to have so many people I loved around me last weekend but to not have you- I felt as if a part of me was so closed but still so far removed from me. I always feel that way anytime something important happens in my life- no matter how big or small I always think of you. Still I know that even though you’re not beside me, you are there- watching as you always have for the past 19 years. So today remember how much we love you, how much we miss you, and how comforting it is to know you are always with us wherever we go.

Forever your girl,

Allison Sunbeam

Graduation Gown Woes

I graduated from college on Saturday. Naturally I knew I was going to want an obnoxious number of pictures from this event and wanted to look my best. Unfortunately graduation caps and gowns are exactly the picture of fashion. This is what I emailed to my mom after my horrific experience trying my gown on.

Just paid the $40 rental fee for my graudation attire. Once again Furman spares no expense. Oh wait we do get to keep the $1 tassel- they are so generous! So even though its the right length (for once) , it is, to my horror, completely unflatterly. Seriously how many pictures am I going to take on this most important occasion? A lot. So let me wear what is essentially a large black bag with lovely wing like arms? Oh you shouldnt have. My one question is....can I belt it? All outfits are pretty much made better by defining a waist- Im thinking a zebra print belt? Genius! (This plan was later vetoed by the powers that may be- apparently zebra isn't serious enough). And really the cap? I am roughly the size of a 12 year old and have a tiny head so if the cap is cutting off the circulation to my brain it is TOO SMALL. Really if I cant wear it, y'all need to re-evaluate you sizing. Also, hoods should not make one look like a rather somber platypus with a burst of purple for fun and should be far easier to put on. Apparently I am smart enough to graduate but not to put on the stuff I'm supposed to wear. Seriously.

Confessions of a Senior Beach Weekend...

Two posts in one week? Chill out folks, its only because I don't really have any homework to be doing right now. Confessions? Don't get your hopes up- this is me writing here so you know its nothing scandalous. Tomorrow is my last undergraduate Monday of class. Excuse me but when did four years fly by and where did they go? I was thinking about how quickly the past four years have happened, especially this last semester, over my last Furman Beach Weekend. Sure everyone around me was thinking about things other than this but as I was sitting on the beach last night with dear friends, I couldn't help but be overwhelmed with the fact that it truly was the end of my senior year of college. Nothing is quite like sitting on a beach at night and staring into the beautiful dark blue ocean to remind that life is so much more that college and beach weekend. College is that thing in the back of your mind that you always think, "Hey, I'll finish that and be an adult! Real world here I come!" In the words of many seniors, we are so not ready for this. How on earth am I the adult when my life's goal is still to be Ariel? The end of this year if forcing me to come face to face with the fact that a big event in my life is ending and soon we will go our separate ways. I cannot help but be overcome with emotion when I think about all of the incredible memories and friends I have made over four years and how I am not quite ready to let them go. Yes I know I have to but we don't always want to let go of what we love, even if we must.

So here's the confession part: I wasn't exactly ready to let go until this weekend. I had so much fun but I realized that at sometime we have to move on and grow up even when we don't want to. Talking to old friends this weekend made me realize that there is so much out there in the world beyond the Furman bubble, incredible things and places where I don't have to take care of everyone all the time. He reminded me that people like me even when I'm not being the mom and taking care of everyone (which I always forget) and that people grow up and don't need to be taken care of all the time. I am realizing that we have to let people be themselves, grow up a little and sometimes make mistakes. Thank goodness I had people around me who let me make mistakes and find out who I am. So even those this weekend was a blast and I got to make so many more memories with people I love, I know that I will be ready to move on and start my life after Furman. Granted I will probably cry while doing this because lets face it I always cry and leaving is always so hard but I know that I am ready to start a crazy new adventure of two years (and maybe some more) in Charleston. So senior year flew by and yes sometimes I wish I could go back and relive some of those incredible memories but I have plenty of pictures (ha!). More importantly, Charleston is flying towards me fast and sometimes you just have to fly the Furman coop. So here comes the world after Furman but we still have two more weeks to take in swimming in the fountains, the beautiful landscape, running trails and incredible friends. And I intend to.

To love like a Lab...

I havent written in a while, mostly because there has been so much going on right now. I'd forgotten how crazy the end of the year can be. Last weekend was particularly rough because my parents had to put down our sweet yellow Labrador, Rocket, very suddenly. My dogs are such a big part of my life so this was of course an incredibly emotional event. This is part of my journal from last weekend and is written just as I first wrote it. Sorry for the terrible rambling sentences but lets be honest, that's how I really talk. I hope this helps you love the way Rocket loved as it has helped me.

April 17th

Today I came home from Furman because we had to put down our sweet Rocket boy. My sweet big baby, my good ole dog, the dog with biggest feet and the softest ears. My boy I held on the way the day we got him when he fell asleep in my arms. My big sweet boy who would protect us no matter what even if he was scared on the vacuum cleaner. Words cannot express how it broke my heart not to hold him and be with him when he was sick and hurting- to know I couldn't comfort the dog who was always there for me- to greet me on a not so happy morning with his happy smiling face, to with me on a swing when I needed to get a way. He was all of ours, not because he was supposed to be a family dog but because he loved all of us so loyally, so purely, so unconditionally. It is so surreal to look out into our big back yard and not see my big yellow dog basking in the sun, laying in the fresh dirt he'd just dug up or playing (sort of) with Scarley. Rocket was for so long, my childhood. He was with for all of the middle school tears and teenage angst. All the drama and boyfriends and heartache. He was always there- even just a wag of his tail or a big goofy grin- the world was always ok. When you have your dog to remind you of the simple joys of life and to just love. I think we forget to love sometimes. We say it but we don't always do it. We lose sight of the joy and happiness of life, of the simple effervescent joy we should get from those we are blessed to be surrounded with. Whenever someone asks me if dogs go to heaven I always say yes because no one can quite represent God's unconditional, constant, and abiding love the way a dog can. Rocket loved us, no matter what- even if we were in a sour mood or quick tempered- he loved and he showed me how to love people in my life- constantly, unconditionally, an encouraging smile, a neck to hug, and an ear to listen. So sweet boy if you're up there in a world where you can have all the soccer balls and milk jugs and chew toys you could ever want, while you're basking in the sun up there- know that your sweet face will never be far from my ind. You grew up with me, let me be your friend, and let me cry on your when I needed it. But mostly you taught me to love and I will remember that. May God grant me the joy for life you had and the ability to try to love as only He can and to show the love to others you showed to us.

So in short, friends, remember to love and love like a lab- unconditionally and never-ending and with a joy for life so inspiring it moves others. Go and love fiercely, like my sweet big dog.

A Beautiful Story

If this doesn't make you tear up, I don't quite know what will. Seriously grab your tissues.
Since today was World Down Syndrome Day this particular story touched me. Not only because it is so emotionally raw and uplifting, but also because it is so true. People with special needs have changed me life: they have given me something to strive to, helped guide me to my calling, made me smile and laugh like no one else, shown me what it means to love unconditionally. No matter if they have Down Syndrome, Autism, CP, or any other special need, they are each beautiful, incredible, unique, and wonderful human beings with a capacity to love that never ceases to astound me. This story is so beautiful because it is absolutely real and something many parents experience each day but offers a message of faith, hope and love. And as we are reminded in Corinthians, the greatest of these is love- a love devoid of stereotypes, prejudice, expectations- just true love. To anyone who loves someone special, someone makes your heart smile and burst with happiness, and who just might change your life- this is for you.

http://donmilleris.com/2010/03/21/nellas-beautiful-story/

Guilty as Charged

Brace yourselves kids because Spring Awakening is almost here. What is it? Oh, I guess I should tell you it. If you're not way into theatre you might not know, but Spring Awakening is certainly a bright spot on Broadway right now. It won 8 Tony Awards in 2007, including Best Musical but all the awards aren't why you should see it (although it probably helps). You should see it because, frankly, its incredible. Seriously go watch songs and clips on YouTube and you'll see what I mean. Although the subject matter is incredibly deep (sex, abuse, teen pregnancy, abortion, suicide, death) the music is modern and rock and songs you cant seem to get out of your head. The story itself is set in the 1890s but the music is all modern and provides a unique juxtaposition with the period costumes. Overall, you forget what time period you're even in because you realize that over 100 years later we are still dealing with and struggling with the same issues. This is a musical that gets at the heart of the human condition and makes the audience realize that they empathize with the characters and really relate to them. In the early 90s RENT changed the way we looked at theatre and defined a generation; SPRING AWAKENING will do that for this generation. So go to www.peacecenter.com and get tickets to see Spring Awakening in Greenville March 16-21 and experience this incredible and life changing show. And then you can join with those who are already guilty ones....

Take a walk along the Battery...

The Crab House Sign

My new running route.

I could get used to this.
This weekend my parents and I went future apartment shopping in Charleston and once again I was reminded why someone should film our family for a reality show- you cant make up some of the insane things that happen to us. Because this was an apartment-hunting trip, my dad naturally looked up a bunch of places to check out close to the school. The good news? We brought Diana, the trusty GPS. The bad news? My mom is so not a fan of Diana and kept yelling directions opposite of what Diana said. Needless to say we got lost. A lot. At any time there were three people shouting out directions and usually me screaming because oh hey that car almost hit us and you so cant turn that way on a one-way street. Of course Diana didn’t fail us and we usually ended up where we were supposed to. What we didn’t realize was how many of those places would be in places that were, shall we say, far less that desirable. Basically a tiny little blonde girl in a polo shirt? So not welcome there. It got to the point that we wouldn’t even be done driving past before my mom would start yelling “Nope. No way. She is so not living there. She’ll die!” Being the baby definitely has some benefits- namely your parents will refuse to let you live in a dump. We did find some promising places so once we had found a few my mom called off the search for the afternoon so that we could go to the Market. Shopping is like second nature to us and my dad has finally realized that fighting against it just isn’t worth it. Of course my mom ran into people with dachshunds and had to talk for 20 minutes (if you know her this should not be a surprise) and kept pointing out how close the dental school is to the apartments I liked (boys with good teeth? Check. ) We got to wander around Charleston on a gorgeous day so really life couldn’t get better.
Since we had dragged my dad to the Market we made up for it by going to the Charleston Crab House on James Island. Even though there is one downtown we had to go to the once on James Island. Why you ask? Oh just because it was once flipped on a TV show by the one and only Richard Davis who my dad practically worships and thinks is the coolest guy ever. Its like he thinks they’re friends or something… Anyway, the food there is always delicious and its one of my favorite restaurants so I was excited. My dad however? Way more excited. Throughout the dinner he talked about R.D. as he calls him, how he wanted one of the shirts from the flip (I told him he could just ask the waiter for his…), how he had highlights in his eyes that would be brought out by said shirt, and that he wanted a tweeter. I have yet to find out what a “Tweeter” is but rest assured he wont get one. The blogosphere isn’t ready for this man. We finished dinner only to run into the same couple with the dachshunds that were so sweet (thankfully Dad didn’t mention the tweeter) and we of course ended our meal with my dad having his picture taken in front of the very sign that Richard Davis hung upside down for the flip. The man has a serious problem.
Being our family, our adventure wasn’t over yet. I’ll spare you the details but we got lost. Again. All we wanted was to find a CVS. What we did find was a really sketchy area but on the other side the greatest gift of all: Krispy Kreme. Maybe you don’t know what its like to hear 3 lost and confused people simultaneously yell for the best doughnuts in the world but we sure do. Once again why do we not have a camera crew following us? We ate our prized doughnuts while trading expressions such as “Batshit crazy” and my new favorite “nuttier than squirrel shit.” The workers there probably thought we were the latter. Before heading back to our La Quinta (my mom asked if they serve chips and dip or maybe breakfast burritos…I had to tell her no and disappoint her) we stopped at the greatest of all grocery stores- Piggly Wiggly. I’m big on the pig and although my mom wouldn’t let me buy another Pig shirt, I learned that I will not be moving to that particular area anytime soon.
The next morning after waking up way too early, we did a little more apartment hunting and found some great ones and some that were not so great (Mom: “No way in hell she’s living there!”) but overall a successful trip. Of course we couldn’t leave without driving to the Battery. I love to walk out there and see the houses, the beautiful architecture, the people, the big old trees, the culture. My dad was excited about the cannons and may or may not have filmed a pelican. The important thing is that we got to go and now I feel so ready to live there. I could not ask for a more beautiful place to live and I could really get used to this (just without the whole weird pelican filming part).

And it you want go listen to www.shannonmcarthur.com for great beachy charleston music to make you long for summer!

Parking is overrated

This is an email I sent to my parents to request more money in my monthly food allowance (mostly for caffine and cereal purposes) for stupid parking tickets. I mean really stupid parking tickets. Here it is in its entirety:

Request: Additional money each month for stupid FUPO parking tickets
Amount:minumum $10
Reason: Apparently after years of never getting parking tickets, FUPO has decided that as a 2nd semester senior I should be targeted and milked for all my cash. I'm pretty sure they have a personal target on me and are so out to get me. I wish I could say that these parking tickets have merit but really they dont. Example: I got back last night from officer slating at 1 am and having dutifully (and selflessly driven my roommates and one Chelsea Garber) discovered that there were no more spaces available apart from the handicap spaces and 15 min slots. Obviously not being dumb enough to park in the handicap space (although I dont think being a varsity athlete who is completely fine should count), I parked in the 15 minute space. Fearing FUPO's rath I left a note informing them that I only parked there because there were no other spaces. Bonus: it was on a cute notepad so I was clearly not at fault. FUPO Officer 15 however disagreed and gave me an overtime ticket at 4:12 am. Yes 4:12 am. Why exactly he thought that giving precious little me a ticket so early in the morning was necessary to campus safety is beyond me. Anyway I saw it this morning, and apart from not being what you would call a morning person, it seriously soured my day. I went to the public safety office to beg, to plead not to have to pay when I am a graduating senior who seriously just wanted to park and get some sleep. I? Am so not a hazard to campus safety. In the end they weren't budging so I had to grudgingly bike over to the lady in the business office I know way too well now and cough up the cash. Therefore in addition to my monthly food allowance that pays for the neccesities like cereal, candy and diet coke, I am firmly requesting money alloted for stupid parking tickets. Please email me directly once you have you reached your decision.
Sincerely,
Little Blonde Girl

You're My Sugar Rush

Everyone’s favorite time of year is over. Yes friends its true- Rush is over. To me, it seems a blur of matching shirts, decorations, songs, skits, dancing, some forgotten tables (seriously how do you loose 13 tables), and one really bad blonde Hannah Montana wig. Although Rush is completely consuming for 2 weeks, it always seems as if I blink and its over. This year we were blessed with an absolutely incredible pledge class but I cannot help but be a little sad. Not because it was not wonderful and fun (and I got to wear aforementioned ridiculous wig) but because this is the very last time I will get to do it. Ok, so I’m sort of excited of no more rush workshops or freaking out about tables not being delivered but I really will miss the experience of it. It seems like not that long ago that I was a new member and some much older senior was talking to me and handing things down to me. Now suddenly, I’m that much older senior- whoa when did that happen? In a way this is so bittersweet- glad that we have a wonderful new group of girls but not quiet ready to leave this all behind. This fall, I could always hold onto the fact that I wasn’t quite on my way out because hey, there was always rush to get through, but now it seems as if everything is all too quickly coming to an end. I feel energized and excited about the new adventures that wait beyond Furman’s fountains and marathon study sessions in Plyler hall- especially after hearing the wonderful Al talk about how incredible law school is. Still, I’m not quite ready to leave these people here who have impacted me in such profound ways. The good news? I still have time to treasure the time I have left here and I sincerely hope to do so- even if it means uncharacteristically putting down the books a few nights. But maybe, just maybe, its time to take off the Hannah Montana wig and be a big kid now. Maybe.

A ring by spring?

The author's friend is asked if she believes there was one true love for every person.

She said essentially, no. She said she and her husband believed they were a cherished prize for each other, and would probably drive any other people mad.

She said she had married a guy, and he was just a guy. He wasn't going to make all her problems go away, because he was just a guy.

And that freed her to really love him as a guy, not as an ultimate problem solver.

And because her husband loved her as just a girl, he was free to really love her too.

Neither needed the other to make everything ok.

They were simply content having company through life's conflicts.

--A Million Miles in A Thousand Years, by Donald Miller

Ok So I stole this from the one and only Allison Renfro but it struck me so much I just had to post it here. As I prepare to embark on my final semester at Furman I am constantly reminded of the adage- "A ring by spring or your money back!"- This happens so frequently at Furman. I am an expert at playing the "Wow I wish I had a boyfriend card" but this quote has reminded me how important it is to wait on the Lord's time. We are not completed by one person but rather we bring out the best in one another- creating something much greater than our individual selves. One person will not solve our problems but will be there with you throughout all of life's ups and downs. This is what I have learned over the past few years at Furman and for once am so excited to be single (shocking I know). I know that I can handle things with the support of my incredible friends that surround me and that one person is not going to swoop in and make everything perfect. This semester I have kept this quote from one of my favorite bands above my bed- "Before you're ready for someone else, you've got to learn to be alright by yourself." I am reminded that you cannot rely on one person but have to find your own inner strength and be ok by yourself but still finding comfort and solace in wonderful friends.
As I contemplate moving to Charleston and am overwhelmed with excitement, I am also overwhelmed with the knowledge that I will go there as someone who has grown so much even within the past year. I cannot wait to meet the person that I should share those problems with but who knows when that will happen. For now I am content to begin my final undergrad semester knowing that I don't see the whole picture and am much to small for that. I must rely on God for his timing (which is so much better than mine) and be sure of myself in Him. I do not need one boy to save me which is something I did not know for a very long time.
On that note I wanted to share how very very excited I am that my best friend Virginia has found the person that brings out the very best in her! I am so incredibly overjoyed for her and J.Mike and cannot help but beam when people ask me if she is engaged or not. I am so excited for the both of them and to share this wonderful time with them!

Hello 2010, lets be friends

New Years has always seemed like a strange holiday to me. I mean the idea of celebrating a new year and bidding goodbye to the old one seems normal enough but I have never understood why everyone thinks that they should get really drunk to do it. I mean if you’re celebrating a new year, don’t you want to remember the first part of it? Apparently some people don’t want to but to be fair I usually don’t either on account of I generally fall asleep right after the ball drops. Which is exactly what I did this past new years. Except that I was in my hometown with my parents and my dog who ironically provided plenty of entertainment. Perhaps it was the sparkling wine, but nothing can be a better new years memory that hearing your mom call your dad a butthead (Ok I said it earlier but he so deserved it) or telling him to stop doing the ice cream and cake dance to and to just drink his dang champagne. This all happened before 7:30. Our entertainment for the evening consisted of a show called My Husband’s Three Wives (creepy), the Disney channel (my choice for its optimism), and some Lifetime movie called Sorority Wars (it got points for being realistic with the foam party but an ice luge- really!?!?). Sorority Wars didn’t last long so our new years consisted mostly of my mom and I reading and my dad, well, he was still being ridiculous with the ice cream and cake dance. The dog (who by conservative estimates is absolutely worshipped) just laid on her third of the couch and watched us all like we were crazy. Our new years was mostly reading, watching ridiculous shows on TV, being half asleep until right before the ball drops, and embracing the ridiculous in all of us. In other words, it was a perfectly wonderful new years. Although the ice luge would have been a nice added touch.

Goodbye Charlie Brown...

I guess the holidays are officially over. Gone are the meticulous decorations my mother puts up, the perfect Christmas tree overloaded with ornaments, the garland I continually knock things off of. Even the faithful nutcrackers have gone. I love the holidays- not just because I like finding people presents and wrapping them or even the decorations. I personally feel the deepest love for the holiday baking season. Ahhh I can practically smell the Christmas tree cookies baking now. I love that the holidays see no reason to restrain your sweet tooth (I sometimes take it upon myself to save on the grocery bill by eating just cereal and sweets). I love when my mom makes dozens of ginger snaps that my brother’s friends fight over or when my dad eats all of the (read: my) puppy chow. But mostly I love the chex mix. For those of you who have never seen me around chex mix, I am positively useless to resist its deliciousness (we have video proof). I used to think that my mom must have done some sort of voodoo on the chex mix bowl we always used to make it come out perfect but apparently its just a lot of Worchestershire sauce (I stand my voodoo theory).

I love the holiday baking season as much as I love the way that the holidays bring out the crazy in all of us. Face it- we all have crazy families its just that some of us are a little more, shall we say, open about our eccentricities. This Christmas all of my family’s craziness was played out against the backdrop of old family movies. According to them not much has changed. Watching these delightfully embarrassing videos I have learned that there are some things that have remained consistent throughout my life. First, I sleep. A lot. I’m not really in my own christening video because I am, well, sleeping- even through the shrieks of my older brother and the commotion that comes with my family. Apparently my talent for sleep through anything, including one of the worst hurricanes in history and various fire alarms, has always been there. Second, I was horribly accident-prone and probably always will be. At my first birthday I almost fall out of chair (this is after I’ve already become close friends with the neurologist at the hospital) and am playing with forks. Yes forks. I couldn’t watch the video out of fear that I would somehow poke Even playing in the leaves I manage to gracefully dive (read slide) into the pile of leaves and sort of can’t get out. Every video we watched have some sort of disaster that seems eminent. When I dancing around being goofy in the videos, all I can think of is: Hello glass window, meet my head. Clearly my affinity for freak accidents is no accident. And finally I figured out what my roommates laugh at when I talk to anyone from my family on the phone: I have a really southern accent. Nothing quite beats hearing my 6-year-old self talk about her “TEE-AR-RAAAAH.” My accent is absolutely ridiculous and can only be described as coming from Hicksville, USA. What’s good is that these videos showed me that, hey, we’ve all got a little crazy in our families so you may as well just embrace it. Even if that means its Christmas day and you all end up dying laughing at how ridiculous/awkward you looked in the 90s or laughing at silly gifts where you receive a twitter shot glass. Ok maybe the shot glass isn’t so normal. Oh well.